Love's not a competition (But I'm winning)

Well love's not a competition, but I'm winning. Or at least I thought I was but there's no way of knowing. 


I should have written this, like a week ago. Today, I could at least say I'm okay now. I'm feeling better today. Love from my family and friends and everything. Thank you guys. I owe you guys bigtime. Especially for my friends who have given me lots of big hugs, Hihi you guys are the sweetest I needed it in times like this. 


HAHAHAHAHHA FUNNY AKALA MO ANONG NANGYARI. FEELING KO NAMATAY O NAOSPITAL! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA Natawa ako sa sarili ko, sa pinaglalagay ko. Tapos alam mo yung seryoso pa tapos english barok pa. Hahahahahahaha Eh simple lang naman kwento ko, kung ano ano pa nabanggit ko. Hahahahahahahah FUNNY!


Wait, nakakaabala naman yung Twitter at Facebook sa pagsususlat ko dito. Hindi ko pa pala nasisimulan ang kwento. So ganito kasi yun, Last week kasi, Sobra talaga akong lungkot, tapos umiiyak pa ko. Corny ko no? Eh totoo naman. Kasi, grabe yung nalaman ko eh. Ako pa talaga yung nakaalam, yung hindi galing sa iba. Mas masakit pag ganun, tapos sa tinuring mo pang kaibigan. Pero, hindi naman nabanggit na ako ang tinutukoy nya sa mahiwaga nyang kwento, pero alam mo yung pakiramdam na, oo alam mo yung sinasabi nya, nararamdaman nya habang ginagawa yung kwento nya? Alam mo yung, alam mong ikaw talaga. Ganun kasi yung naramdaman ko. Hindi ko na nagawang tanungin siya, kasi sobra talaga yung galit ko. Alam kong mali ako kasi pinangunahan ko lahat, oo, hindi ko naman alam din ang mga nangyari, ang alam ko lang yun lang. Hindi ko naman alam lahat nangyayari kasi wala ako dun eh. Aminado talaga ako, mali talaga ako dito sa nangyayari na to. Parang ako lang gumagawa ng lahat talaga, since day 1. Puro ako nagsasalita. Wala akong naririnig kahit isa sa kabilang side. Minsan kailangan ko ng answers eh. Kaya siguro ang galing ko manghula sa exams. 


Naawa pa ko kay Papu. Kasi nasa harap ako ng computer, tapos kausap ko isa kong kaibigan na todo magbigay ng mga wala akong masabing payo. Grabe talaga, sa hindi ko maintindihan na pakiramdam ko, hindi ko napigilan umiyak, eh biglang dumating si Papu, tapos hindi ko sya masagot, kasi ayokong humarap, makikita nya ko. Tapos alam mo yung gustong gusto nya ko kausapin, pero hindi mangyayari kasi naiiyak na ko, hanggang sa di ko napigilan, pumasok ako ng banyo, nagbukas ng tubig tapos naiyak talaga ako. Nung lumabas si Papu para magtimpla ng kape, pumasok na ko sa kwarto at umiyak. Pasensya na Papu, hindi ko na napigilan, gusto ko pa man din makipagkwentuhan. Pasensya na, babawi naman ako. Tapos pinilit kong maging okay, kasi padating na ang aking Ina. Pero thank you talaga sa kaibigan kong yun, kung pwede lang itabi yung mga mensahe mo sakin. At babasahin ko minsan pag natatanga ako. Salamat ah! Kilala mo kung sino ka. :-)


Ayoko na. Nakakapagod na to. Gusto ko ng totoong tao. Please. Sorry, kung sisirain ko na ang lahat. Oo, sa kabilang banda nanghihinayang ako sa lahat. Sa dami ng pinagsamahan. Uy corny na sa part na to. Haha! Pero please. Kailangan eh, kailangan mangyari to. Wag na nating isipin kung sino ang nagsimula at gumawa neto, basta, ako ang nagtapos. 




"Is there anything worth looking for, worth loving for,worth lying for. Is there anything worth waiting for, worth living for, worth dying for."

What's the purpose of Relationshit?

So anong meron sa title ko? Haha. Baka naman sabihin niyo bitter ako or something. I was thinking about this topic since yesterday, and I've decided to write it here on scattered pages under my bed. Hihi 


I'm single and I'm happy, yes people I'm happy and contented with what I have right now. Supportive and cranky friends. Lovable parents and a lovely dog. Good life. Good health. I'm really fine. Try to ask yourselves, for those who have boyfriends and girlfriends. Are you happy with your someone right now? I know you'd say yes. Do you feel the love that they want to share? I know you'd say very much. Do you love waking up in the morning with someone holding you and sharing some sheets? I know you'd say, I don't want to get up and just stay in bed. I know most of you would say these things. I know most of you feel so 101% happy and contented in life and just want to stay that way forever. But we all know that there's no such thing as forever, and that things  that make us happy only last for a while. I know that some of you doesn't know that.


Boys, why do you ask girls for them to say yes? Why do you tell them that they are the prettiest girl alive? Why do you tell them you won't leave them? Why do you tell them I love you everyday? Does it make you feel good? Does it make you feel happy? For you, does this feeling last for a lifetime? Does it makes you a better person? 


No one knows.


Girls, why do you tell them you want them to stay? Forever? For the rest of my life? Why do you tell them to be your knight and shining armor? Why do you tell them to kiss you every time they see you? Why? Does it change your way of living? Does it change your lifestyle? Does it change yourself? Does it change everything?


No one knows too.


So why do you think people have this kind of commitment? Does it..Should stop staying this Does thing. So why do people propose some kind of an agreement for themselves? To stay, care and love each other? Do you really need a relationship when you can stay, care and love someone without these thing that they call, "Relationship"? We could all love, stay and care for someone whenever we want to, whenever we feel to, and just whenever.




"Gonna free fall out into nothing Oh, I’m gonna leave this, this world for a while. Now I’m free, free falling, falling."